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Should I die, this blog will serve as my son's source of virtual mama.

If I live, I won't have to repeat myself.

sigers writes fiction and nags her son in austin, texas. 

I want you to watch your daily intake and output of snark.

I want you to watch your daily intake and output of snark.

In life, Ami-pants, you’re going to meet a certain group of magnetic, intelligent, funny people. I am about make a case for avoiding them like they have cooties on the playground.

Oh these people can be great conversationalists. They’ll have an ability to assemble words into a sharp saber and jab it home. You’ll be jubilant when they are on your side, which they are … most of the time.

But their overall life focus is to sit around throwing mental boulders at other people. Or how crappy this party is. Or how that dude in the next cubicle has NO idea what he’s doing with those spreadsheets. Or how laaaaaame this job is. But these boulders are the most well-crafted, hilarious, paragraphs you’ve ever heard. I have known a few of those boulder throwers.

Occasionally I have been one. 

A company I used to work for used to bring in new messiahs all the time. These messiahs were going to save us. By the time we got to the seventh one, I could roll my eyes so hard that my face would look like a slot machine. 

Snark was nice and warm and familiar. I could wallow comfortably for hours in it. And the hours turned into years. And I realized that I hadn’t actually done anything to get away from the messiah parade. I got a new job. I got happier. I could have done that a long time ago and had much happier days.

I want you to know that if you find yourself complaining each and every day about a situation or a job or a person, then find a better one.

Or shut up.

You would be amazed by how many people I know that seem to spend their whole lives hurling little digs at people - people they know, people they pass on the street, celebrities - anybody.

I know those people, but I don’t hang out with them. Know why?

The Organic Sister says it best:

“You are the average of the 5 people you spend the most time with. – You want to radically change your life? Surround yourself with examples that it’s possible. You want to live a deeper, more meaningful existence? Engage in deeper, more meaningful conversations with the people talking about deeper, more meaningful things. Don’t let the limitations of what those around you can do become your reality. Seek out possibilities, surround yourself with inspiration, and what seems impossible will soon become the only thing you know.”

Pumpkin Boy, don’t throw off your ratio of wonderful by hanging out with bitter, mean people. No matter how funny or talented or cool they may be. All the laugher and smug grins have a nasty bitter aftertaste.

Find new friends. And if you’re the bitter one? I want you to find new, positive friends, and shut up and allow their positivity to change you back into your true self.

I want you to know that we are on the Ebony Jr. version of Martin Luther King, Jr.

I want you to know that we are on the Ebony Jr. version of Martin Luther King, Jr.

I want you to know why I need a more accurate title than "single mom."

I want you to know why I need a more accurate title than "single mom."